 Morgan Barclay
Saved by the Bell had many great episodes, but one, and only one,
commonly referred to as “The Sprain” –
gets my vote, and should get yours when you go for a roller
coaster of a ride leading up to a unforgettable Dance Off
at the Max. Some German historians taut “The Sprain”
to be more eventful than David Hasselhoff’s ending
of the Cold War with his performance of “Looking for
Freedom” while atop the rubble of the fallen Berlin
wall while wearing a Piano scarf.(circa 1989) The best episode,
“The Sprain”, definitely stuck to it’s
core premise of A.C. Slater and Zack Morris (aka Preppy)
battling for time spent with Kelly Kapowski; but, the subplot
of Lisa Turtle kicking in her TV set(spraining her ankle)
because Revlon discontinued her FAV nail polish –
led to THE episode of all episodes. How? Well, when Lisa’s
loyal Plan B, Samuel “Screech” Powers, offers
to lend Miss Turtle a helping hand, or leg, in this matter,
we learn there is more to dancing than just raw talent.
We learn that interracial dating is in fact; between races.
(Ebony and Ivory, dancing in perfect Harmony) To this day,
Spike Lee credits “The Sprain” as the inspirational
love story behind his writing and directing of the 1991
controversial movie “Jungle Fever”. How else
has “The Sprain” influenced American pop culture?
Decent question. “The Sprain” provides glimpses
into what I perceive to be the prequel to “Showgirls”,
as Zack receives daily dance lessons from future striper
Elizabeth Berkley. For me, after “The Sprain”
aired, Saturday mornings progressed to more than just punchy
jokes from a bunch of Bayside teens. It got sexual. Did
I just write that? Anyway, if you were a true fan, you will
also remember Kelly and Slater as the Spandex Twins. They
were as hot as really Hot Tomales. Oh, did you forget that
Top 40 host Casey Kasem found time to stop by The Max to
be the MC for this infamous dance off? Well, he did, so
shut up. Needless to say, “The Sprain” took
the world by storm when Screech and Lisa “No Hare”
Turtle captured the crown with their unorthodox one legged
dance routine that brought T.V. audiences to their feet
and tears for a couple minutes; then you probably turned
it to “Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers”. When I
saw “The Sprain” for the first time: I laughed,
I cried, and I did some other stuff to an episode I believe
ended communism, took interracial dating to the next level,
and showed all of us that sometimes; stripping is not a
bad way to make a living. Just ask Jessie Spano.
|
 Brian Williamson
On November 3rd, 1990, the Saved by the Bell franchise aired its
greatest episode, “Jessie’s Song,” a poignant
and daring 22 minute-program that left fans shocked, informed,
and soiled across the globe. Yes, people literally peed
themselves it was that good.
You remember it. In a departure from its typical wholesome
goodness, the show’s writers take us to the deep,
dark world of drug abuse. And yes, when I say drugs, I mean
caffeine pills.
If the show was done in the exaggerated and over-the-top
style that we see on TV today, it’s likely the episode
would have had Lisa selling reefer under the bleachers to
the new kid in the wheelchair. Or maybe Miss Bliss would
have made a triumphant return, only to find Zack giving
Mr. Belding head under the bleachers in exchange for a line
of nose candy.
Lucky for us, it was written 16 years ago when the SBTB
writing staff didn’t need to use the handicapped or
gay sex to drive their message home…just a single
of bottle of Stay Alert.
Sure, now everybody’s doing caffeine pills and staying
up way past midnight, but in 1990 eight hours of sleep were
crucial to the high school formula for success. The SBTB
staffers knew how important organic sleep was for teens
and they set out a plan to tackle this all-important topic
with a vengeance, and they did just that.
Of course, writing perfection was only half the story.
Enter Elizabeth Berkley, one of the greatest actors of all
time. After A.C. tells her character, “those pills
are dangerous,” Berkley masterfully sets up her audience
with the adlibbed “yeah, well so’s geometry.”
The brilliance continues as Berkley coolly nails line after
line and even displays a Mariah Carey falsetto in the ladies
locker room. Then, as if that wasn’t enough, the unthinkable
happens. In a performance that Meryl Streep could only dream
of, Berkley brings down the house with her classic lines,
“I’m so excited. I’m so…scared.”
If that doesn’t make you dump your caffeine pills
into the garbage and pee your pants, I don’t know
what will.
All in all, “Jessie’s Song” is what great
TV shows are made of. It’s funny, entertaining, and
its “don’t do drugs” message not only
plummeted the sales of caffeine pills in the 90’s,
but single-handedly spawned the D.A.R.E program in high
schools nationwide, led by Nancy Reagan, a huge Saved by
the Bell fan. Stay excited Jessie, we’re the ones
who should be scared.
|
 Zaahir Syed
There’s a lot one can learn how from such an epic series
as Saved by the Bell. David Blaine might even credit his
magical abilities to the lessons learned from Max’s
clever slights of hand and Rick Dees might even credit his
success to the Casey Kasem cameo. Each episode is such a
gem that you don’t even know what you walked away
with after each viewing. I can positively say that “The
Showdown” taught me something that has been critical
throughout my twenty-four years:
How to fight.
Let me take a step back. Unlike my Caucasian DTY counterparts,
I’m not 6’40” and don’t have the
girth of a walrus. Hence, I’m not strong and would
lose in a fight 11 out of 10 times (1 extra for the injuries
suffered and punitive damages). Before watching this particular
episode I had always thought my first move in a fight should
somehow incorporate any swift kick and the opponent’s
nads. After watching this episode I realized that there
were two keys steps I was missing – 1) The Faceguard/Punch
Method and 2) The Ability to Reason.
For those with poor memories, this episode dates to the
Miss Bliss years when the cast were wee middle schoolers
and the show was based in the DST-inept Indianapolis. In
this most poignant of episodes, Screech faces off with Deke,
the new illiterate kid that doesn’t know how to spell
his own name. Given the fact that he can’t read, his
natural tendencies, and the creative writing of Peter Engel,
lead to the culmination that is a quarrel with hubris-free
Screech Powers.
Deke kicked things off by stating, “You know what
would make me feel better? Erasing the lines on the basketball
court...with your face!” Pure genius. Given the size
differentiation, Screech’s first tactic was to save
face, both literally and figuratively – rather than
running away scared or incorporating my nads/kick method,
Screech decided to stand his ground and cover his face with
his right hand while peaking through and punching around
with his left hand. Purer genius. Though not successful
in that particular fight, Screech’s method taught
me what I could do if I got into a fight with an illiterate
kid and wanted to protect my glasses.
Screech’s second tactic is what has saved my ass
many a times – reasoning with someone empathetically
so they won’t beat you up severely. I first did this
with my sister. She can’t read.
Pretty much, this my choice for the best episode because
I haven’t been beaten up yet and my glasses are still
A-Ok. And I learned about the genius of “face”
jokes.
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