Michael Vick Pleas To Reverse Sentence to 23 Dog Years

VIRGINIA—Micheal Vick, the suspended Falcons quarterback, asked the Federal Government yesterday if he could be re-sentenced in Dog Years. Vick believes this will send a "Zero Tolerance" message to those who are currently involved in Dog Fighting -- as he's trying to clean up his image. Michael Vick told the press this past week that's it's unfair his co-defendants, Purnell Peace and Quanis Phillips, got a measly 18 and 21 Human Months in prison.

"Months are for babies," complained Michael Vick (27 years old), "If I get dog years, I'll be well over 50 when I get out, which will make a statement to dog lovers everywhere." Mike's attorney, Billy Martin, had this to say to the press, "If Mike sticks with human months, he'll most likely be 210 dog years old when he gets out. And I reminded Michael that Brett Favre is playing his best football right now, and he's 266, and expected to play into the 300s!"



NFL commissioner, Roger Goodell, thinks the judge should go soft on Michael Vick, as Mike's already served 6 long-and-hard Falcon Years.

2009 Update:Michael Vick is no longer a jail bird but is playing for another birded team, ironically...as the Eagles signed him for a 2-year deal. Michael recently told Twitter that, "I have no plans to partake in cock fighting but I definitely get the joke and promise not to find it funny."